The other, less prolific half here. Sorry, no adorable pictures this time. Just cold, cold, print.

Today was a bit of a milestone for me, in that I had to introduce myself to a room full of co-workers. In Japanese.

For those keeping score, it might seem odd that I’m just getting around to introducing myself to most of my co-workers. And you would be correct. For 2+ months, I have been floating around the office as, “that new guy who doesn’t look like any of us and doesn’t speak our language and what exactly is he doing here, well at least he doesn’t drink all the coffee,” (my words, I think).

My Japanese is not good. I’m not being humble. Sure, if you meet me, and you don’t speak Japanese, you might be wowed – or discomfited – by the swiftness with which I can order a draft beer. But that’s about it. Otherwise it’s a whole lot of mumbling and bumbling.

So here’s what I wanted to say, followed by what I was capable of saying:

Hi, I am Dan./Hi, I am Dan.

Pleased to meet you/Pleased to meet you.

Please excuse my accent. I’m sorry I can’t speak better Japanese./ I’m sorry. I cannot speak Japanese.

Unlike a lot of people my age, I’ve managed to stay in the same city for a number of years. It was about that time that I either made roots, or picked up and tried a new town, you know? I chose the latter, so here I am! You’ve been wonderful hosts so far. I’m so happy to be here./ I am from Washington, DC.

I work for —–. But beyond that, I really look forward to meeting all of you. You all seem like interesting people, and you obviously get along very well. Seriously, stop by my desk. We’ll go out and get a drink./I work for —–

Please treat me well./Please treat me well.

Oh by the way, how do I use all of the buttons on the toilet?/…..